1 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:14,000 Resyncing: Walter Santos 2 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:28,251 Mr Simpson has the floor. Continue. 3 00:01:28,252 --> 00:01:32,380 For the past 15 years, Pa Kettle's house has been a disgrace to our community... 4 00:01:32,465 --> 00:01:34,504 and an unfit place to be lived in. 5 00:01:34,592 --> 00:01:37,379 -The backyard looks like the city dump. -Ain't it? 6 00:01:37,470 --> 00:01:39,462 This being the findings of our committee... 7 00:01:39,555 --> 00:01:43,719 -I therefore move to condemn the Kettle house and to... -Hold on a minute, Simpson. 8 00:01:43,809 --> 00:01:47,143 There's a family of 15 living in that house... Or is it 16? 9 00:01:47,229 --> 00:01:51,607 I don't see how we can throw them all out. We should give them another chance. 10 00:01:51,692 --> 00:01:54,978 Tell them to spruce the place up so it looks presentable. 11 00:01:55,070 --> 00:01:58,107 Pa'll never spruce up that place and you know it. 12 00:01:58,199 --> 00:02:01,614 He ain't lifted a hand since he moved in, unless it was to borrow somethin'. 13 00:02:01,702 --> 00:02:04,738 Sit down, Birdie. I didn't recognize you. 14 00:02:04,830 --> 00:02:07,914 Sit down, Birdie. He didn't recognize you. 15 00:02:14,465 --> 00:02:16,541 Scat! 16 00:02:24,183 --> 00:02:26,555 Hey, Pa! Pa! Where are ya? 17 00:02:26,643 --> 00:02:30,641 -I'm in the bedroom, Ma. -Whatcha doin' in there? 18 00:02:32,357 --> 00:02:34,979 Thought I'd take a whirl at gettin' dressed. 19 00:02:35,068 --> 00:02:37,738 Somethin' seems to be missing. 20 00:02:37,821 --> 00:02:40,027 I got it. 21 00:02:40,115 --> 00:02:43,199 Ma! Where's my long underwear? 22 00:02:43,285 --> 00:02:46,369 Hangin' on the clothesline. I just washed 'em. 23 00:02:46,455 --> 00:02:50,951 What'd you wanna go and do that fer? I just put 'em on the other day. 24 00:02:51,042 --> 00:02:53,035 You put 'em on last winter. 25 00:02:57,549 --> 00:03:00,218 I'm gonna miss that suit of longies. 26 00:03:00,302 --> 00:03:02,875 Don't blame you, you been together so long. 27 00:03:02,971 --> 00:03:06,340 I got you a new pair the other day. Billy Reed was by with his wagon. 28 00:03:06,433 --> 00:03:09,967 That's a regular travelin' department store. Here. Go put 'em on. 29 00:03:10,061 --> 00:03:12,813 -What in the world is this, Ma? -What's wrong now? 30 00:03:12,897 --> 00:03:14,807 I don't hold with secondhand underwear. 31 00:03:14,899 --> 00:03:18,518 What do you mean secondhand? That there underwear's brand new. 32 00:03:18,611 --> 00:03:20,937 Brand new, nothin'. They tore right in half. 33 00:03:22,824 --> 00:03:26,869 They ain't tore, Pa. That's the latest thing. Now go put 'em on. 34 00:03:26,953 --> 00:03:31,164 Well, all right, but these durn things ain't gonna keep my knees warm. 35 00:03:32,625 --> 00:03:35,875 Ma, afraid these are gonna be a mite too big. 36 00:03:35,962 --> 00:03:38,749 Oh, well, that's funny. Billy Reed said they'd be just right. 37 00:03:38,840 --> 00:03:41,591 Might be, if he was in here with me. 38 00:03:41,676 --> 00:03:45,092 Oh, well, just pin 'em up for now. They'll shrink when I wash 'em. 39 00:03:45,179 --> 00:03:49,129 There you go. Ain't even had 'em on, and you're talkin' about washin' 'em already. 40 00:03:49,225 --> 00:03:53,270 -Can't understand you, Ma. -Well, somebody has to keep things neat around here. 41 00:03:53,354 --> 00:03:57,566 Gotta hand it to you, Ma. You've done wonders with the place. 42 00:04:00,945 --> 00:04:04,610 Sure beats me. If you ain't washin', you're a-readin'. 43 00:04:04,699 --> 00:04:10,120 Oh, don't get much time for readin' with 14 kids to take care of. 44 00:04:10,204 --> 00:04:12,113 Fifteen, ain't it, Ma? 45 00:04:12,206 --> 00:04:15,207 Oh, yeah. I keep forgettin' about Benjamin. 46 00:04:17,378 --> 00:04:21,458 You know, Pa, I heard somethin' new over the radio today. 47 00:04:21,549 --> 00:04:26,507 They call it hygiene. They say you can raise a better bunch of kids with it. 48 00:04:26,595 --> 00:04:31,056 Let 'em raise their own kids with it. We done all right without it. 49 00:04:32,143 --> 00:04:34,182 Well, I don't know, Pa. 50 00:04:36,063 --> 00:04:38,388 Course, Tom turned out real good. 51 00:04:39,942 --> 00:04:42,433 Say, he ought to be comin' home in a day or two, oughtn't he? 52 00:04:42,528 --> 00:04:45,731 Guess so. He's all done graduatin' from college. 53 00:04:46,865 --> 00:04:48,941 Just think of it. 54 00:04:50,244 --> 00:04:54,740 A Kettle goin' to college. And graduatin'! 55 00:04:54,832 --> 00:04:57,619 -A lot you had to do with it. -I give my permission, didn't I? 56 00:04:57,709 --> 00:05:01,493 Yeah, permission for him to work like a dog to pay for his tuition. 57 00:05:01,588 --> 00:05:04,542 There's a boy you can really call a self-made man. 58 00:05:04,633 --> 00:05:08,500 Yes, indeed. Like father, like son. 59 00:05:13,892 --> 00:05:17,178 Carved this out of a wilderness. 60 00:05:26,405 --> 00:05:28,693 Guess I'll turn the radio on. 61 00:05:39,417 --> 00:05:41,790 Too loud. 62 00:05:45,382 --> 00:05:49,794 -What about the roof on the henhouse, Pa? -What about it, Ma? 63 00:05:49,886 --> 00:05:53,255 -You said you was gonna fix it one of these days. -When did I say that? 64 00:05:53,348 --> 00:05:56,598 -Last March. -Well, then I will. 65 00:05:56,685 --> 00:06:00,184 -Will what? -Fix it one of these days. 66 00:06:00,271 --> 00:06:04,399 -What about the well you was gonna dig in the backyard? -I'll do that another day. 67 00:06:04,484 --> 00:06:06,939 Can't do everything in one day, Ma. 68 00:06:07,028 --> 00:06:10,029 Don't mess up my floor, Pa, with that tobacco. 69 00:06:10,114 --> 00:06:12,356 Sorry. It's this old pouch. 70 00:06:12,450 --> 00:06:16,282 Ought to be gettin' my new one any day now. Sent away for it weeks ago. 71 00:06:16,371 --> 00:06:18,410 Where you gettin' the money to send away for a tobacco pouch? 72 00:06:18,498 --> 00:06:20,574 Oh, it don't cost no money. 73 00:06:20,667 --> 00:06:23,952 Just had to fill in the coupon with my name and address... 74 00:06:24,045 --> 00:06:26,915 and write a few words about King Henry tobacco. 75 00:06:27,006 --> 00:06:31,633 Ad said that everybody that answered would get a free pouch. 76 00:06:31,719 --> 00:06:35,847 Oh. I still think you ought to fix the roof on the henhouse. 77 00:06:35,932 --> 00:06:41,518 How'd you like to sit in the broilin' sun all day and have to lay eggs besides? 78 00:06:41,604 --> 00:06:45,020 I don't think I could do it. Well, don't worry about the roof, Ma. 79 00:06:45,107 --> 00:06:49,816 I'll get around to it soon as I can borrow a few pounds of nails and a saw. 80 00:06:49,904 --> 00:06:52,573 Guess I returned 'em too soon. 81 00:06:52,657 --> 00:06:57,153 I could take a look at the spot where I'm gonna dig the well. 82 00:06:57,244 --> 00:07:00,411 You been lookin' at it for a year and a half. It's time you did somethin'. 83 00:07:00,498 --> 00:07:02,786 You're a beaver, Ma. 84 00:07:02,875 --> 00:07:04,832 Might take some dynamite out there. 85 00:07:19,683 --> 00:07:22,305 Oh. 86 00:07:22,394 --> 00:07:25,894 Nobody can say I married him for his money. 87 00:07:25,981 --> 00:07:28,472 Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! 88 00:07:28,567 --> 00:07:33,063 Mayor Dwiggins and the whole town council and Birdie Hicks and her ma... 89 00:07:33,155 --> 00:07:35,990 -They're havin' a meetin' right now. -Wait a minute, Billy. 90 00:07:36,075 --> 00:07:37,984 -I'm Danny. -Uh, Danny. 91 00:07:38,077 --> 00:07:40,912 -What's this meetin' all about, son? -It's about us. This place. 92 00:07:40,996 --> 00:07:43,321 -They're meetin' to see about condemnin' it. -Condemnin' it? 93 00:07:43,415 --> 00:07:46,831 Yeah. I just ran into Mayor Dwiggins' boy, Fred, and he told me. 94 00:07:46,919 --> 00:07:51,746 It wasn't his pa's fault. Birdie Hicks said this place was a menace to public health. 95 00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:53,749 His pa had to hold the meetin'. 96 00:07:53,842 --> 00:07:58,587 Birdie Hicks has been sore ever since I beat her at the quilt contest at the County Fair. 97 00:07:58,680 --> 00:08:02,096 -Where'll we go? Where'll we live? -Oh, calm down, Benjamin. 98 00:08:02,184 --> 00:08:06,644 -Votin' to condemn is one thing. Carryin' out the order is another. -What can we do? 99 00:08:06,730 --> 00:08:11,688 I ain't sure yet, but if they do try to put us off this property, we'll be ready for 'em. 100 00:08:11,777 --> 00:08:14,314 -Danny, go get the rest of the kids. -Okay, Ma. 101 00:08:23,705 --> 00:08:26,278 In view of what Mr Rogers has just said... 102 00:08:26,374 --> 00:08:29,044 -I would consi... -It's Alvin over at the telegraph office. 103 00:08:29,127 --> 00:08:33,077 He says he has to talk to you right away. It's very important. 104 00:08:33,173 --> 00:08:36,589 Hello, Alvin. What's on your mind? What's that? 105 00:08:36,676 --> 00:08:39,547 You got a message that said what? 106 00:08:39,637 --> 00:08:42,425 Calm down. I can't understand you. 107 00:08:43,933 --> 00:08:48,227 No. Are you sure it's the right Kettle? 108 00:08:48,313 --> 00:08:52,061 Listen, Alvin, send that telegram over here. I want to deliver it myself. 109 00:08:52,150 --> 00:08:55,733 I know it's against the rules, but this is a civic event. 110 00:08:55,820 --> 00:08:58,109 Why, this'll put the Cape on the map. 111 00:08:58,197 --> 00:09:01,531 -I move we adjourn. -What about condemning the Kettle place? 112 00:09:01,618 --> 00:09:05,829 We won't have to condemn it, Billings. The Kettle family won't live there another week. 113 00:09:05,913 --> 00:09:08,120 -What do you mean? -Alvin just told me... 114 00:09:08,207 --> 00:09:10,745 the King Henry Tobacco Company sent him a wire. 115 00:09:10,835 --> 00:09:13,326 He won a brand new house in their slogan contest. 116 00:09:13,421 --> 00:09:18,045 How in the world did he win a contest? 117 00:09:18,134 --> 00:09:21,419 As soon as we get the telegram, we're going up to Pa Kettle's. 118 00:09:21,512 --> 00:09:26,008 He's bought us a million dollars worth of publicity. The least we can do is pay our respects. 119 00:09:26,100 --> 00:09:30,976 That's the most exciting thing that's happened on the Cape since the Bijou put in talkies. 120 00:09:47,496 --> 00:09:49,987 He must be home. His carriage is here. 121 00:09:50,082 --> 00:09:52,787 Blow the horn, Sam. 122 00:09:56,630 --> 00:09:58,753 Come on. Let's have a look around. 123 00:10:17,025 --> 00:10:20,145 Ouch! Hey, what's the idea? 124 00:10:20,237 --> 00:10:22,313 That must be Henry. He hasn't missed you in a month. 125 00:10:22,406 --> 00:10:25,111 Ow! 126 00:10:31,707 --> 00:10:33,616 -Ouch! -Ow! 127 00:10:38,672 --> 00:10:43,085 Say, wait a minute, kids. All I wanna do is talk to your pa. 128 00:10:59,860 --> 00:11:02,267 Hey! Hey, Pa Kettle! Are ya home? 129 00:11:02,362 --> 00:11:04,853 Yes, we're home, and we intend to stay here. 130 00:11:04,948 --> 00:11:07,617 Oh, no, you don't... 131 00:11:10,453 --> 00:11:13,988 You don't understand, Ma. I got a telegram for Pa. 132 00:11:14,082 --> 00:11:18,376 A telegram, huh? Why didn't Alvin bring it over? 133 00:11:18,461 --> 00:11:22,210 And what are those others here for? To gloat? 134 00:11:22,298 --> 00:11:26,296 This is our property, Mayor, and ya ain't gonna trick us off it. 135 00:11:26,386 --> 00:11:30,466 We're not tryin' to trick ya. Will you let us come in under a flag of truce? 136 00:11:31,766 --> 00:11:35,978 Might as well get it over with. Hold your fire, kids. 137 00:11:41,359 --> 00:11:44,146 Hey, Pa! Pa! 138 00:11:44,237 --> 00:11:47,819 Come here a minute. The Mayor's got somethin' to say to us. 139 00:11:53,663 --> 00:11:56,498 Come up here on the porch, Mayor. 140 00:12:06,509 --> 00:12:10,341 -Howdy. -Ahem. As mayor of this fair community... 141 00:12:10,429 --> 00:12:12,920 I deem it an honour and a privilege... 142 00:12:13,015 --> 00:12:15,685 to present to you this telegram. 143 00:12:20,898 --> 00:12:23,436 Don't hold with readin' telegrams. Might be bad news. 144 00:12:23,526 --> 00:12:25,483 Read it to him, Sam. 145 00:12:27,696 --> 00:12:29,654 "Dear Mr Kettle: 146 00:12:29,740 --> 00:12:33,608 "Your entry in the King Henry Tobacco Slogan Contest has won the grand prize: 147 00:12:33,702 --> 00:12:37,617 "A prefabricated model house of the future, completely furnished. 148 00:12:37,706 --> 00:12:41,490 Congratulations. Signed, Victor Tomkins, President, King Henry Tobacco Company. " 149 00:12:41,585 --> 00:12:43,494 Congratulations, Pa. 150 00:12:43,587 --> 00:12:46,956 -That all it says in the telegram? -Why, yes. 151 00:12:47,049 --> 00:12:51,047 -Don't it say nothin' about my new tobacco pouch? -Tobacco pouch? 152 00:12:51,136 --> 00:12:53,425 Never figured on winning a house. 153 00:12:53,514 --> 00:12:58,472 The ad said everybody that wrote in would get a new tobacco pouch. 154 00:12:58,560 --> 00:13:00,600 Well, if this ain't the age of miracles. 155 00:13:00,687 --> 00:13:04,602 I never thought I'd live to see the day Pa'd get somethin' he didn't have to return. 156 00:13:04,691 --> 00:13:06,980 What kind of a slogan did ya write, Pa? 157 00:13:07,069 --> 00:13:10,153 Can't rightly remember. Wrote it on the back of something. 158 00:13:17,412 --> 00:13:19,784 Gonna blast a well in the back. 159 00:13:25,087 --> 00:13:26,996 -I got it. -Read it. 160 00:13:27,089 --> 00:13:29,414 All right. 161 00:13:29,508 --> 00:13:33,340 "For smokin' or chewin', King Henry's most fittin'. 162 00:13:33,428 --> 00:13:36,762 It smells awful good, and it's dandy for spittin'." 163 00:13:36,848 --> 00:13:39,553 Wonderful, Pa. 164 00:13:39,643 --> 00:13:42,181 Isn't that a great slogan, folks? 165 00:13:42,270 --> 00:13:45,271 Great slogan. Hmph. I didn't even know Pa could write. 166 00:13:45,357 --> 00:13:49,853 Me either. Hmph. I didn't even know Pa could write. 167 00:13:49,945 --> 00:13:53,230 -Congratulations again, Pa. -Let me see that telegram. 168 00:13:57,869 --> 00:14:01,534 Well, it's true, all right. Pa's won himself a contest. 169 00:14:01,623 --> 00:14:04,327 You sure it don't say nothin' about a tobacco pouch? 170 00:14:04,417 --> 00:14:09,162 Listen to him worryin' about a new tobacco pouch when we've got a brand new house. 171 00:14:10,548 --> 00:14:12,375 Don't need a new house. 172 00:14:14,844 --> 00:14:16,801 Him lit. 173 00:14:23,311 --> 00:14:26,063 Do need a new tobacco pouch. 174 00:14:34,947 --> 00:14:38,992 -Ticket to Cape Flattery, please. -Did you say Cape Flattery? 175 00:14:39,076 --> 00:14:41,034 Yes. Why, you know someone there? 176 00:14:41,120 --> 00:14:44,536 No. No, I don't, but look there. 177 00:14:44,624 --> 00:14:48,324 Mr and Mrs Kettle. Know any folks named Kettle there? 178 00:14:48,419 --> 00:14:51,539 -Kettle? Yes. -You do, huh? 179 00:14:51,631 --> 00:14:54,631 Says there they lived in abject poverty all their life... 180 00:14:54,717 --> 00:14:58,584 -'til they won this new home. -There was nothing abject about it. 181 00:14:58,679 --> 00:15:03,425 The Kettles were a poor family, but they got by. If you ask me, they got by just fine. 182 00:15:03,517 --> 00:15:06,139 You seem to know these Kettles pretty well. 183 00:15:06,228 --> 00:15:09,597 -I ought to. I'm their son. -Oh. 184 00:15:14,403 --> 00:15:16,360 This way, please. 185 00:15:18,949 --> 00:15:23,077 Excuse me, ma'am. Do you mind if this young lady shares your table? 186 00:15:23,162 --> 00:15:26,613 Not at all. Sit right down, my dear. 187 00:15:26,707 --> 00:15:29,708 -Thank you. And thank you, steward. -You're welcome. 188 00:15:29,793 --> 00:15:33,577 -Oh. Better sit over there, dear. -Were you expecting someone else? 189 00:15:33,672 --> 00:15:35,997 No, we weren't expecting anyone else. 190 00:15:36,091 --> 00:15:41,252 But it's been a long time since anyone as young and pretty as you sat on Albert's lap. 191 00:15:46,143 --> 00:15:47,934 Albert? 192 00:15:48,020 --> 00:15:53,441 My husband. I bet you'd like that, you rascal. 193 00:15:54,568 --> 00:15:56,477 Well, I'm afraid I... 194 00:15:56,570 --> 00:15:58,479 left something back in my compartment. 195 00:15:58,572 --> 00:16:00,814 -I'd better go and get it. -Oh, please don't go. 196 00:16:00,907 --> 00:16:02,651 Albert isn't very talkative... 197 00:16:02,743 --> 00:16:07,120 and suppers are much more fun when you have someone to pass the time of day with. 198 00:16:07,205 --> 00:16:11,583 Well, I guess I can pick it up later. 199 00:16:11,668 --> 00:16:15,832 You know, usually me and Albert sit on the same side of the table... 200 00:16:15,922 --> 00:16:18,674 but he just can't ride forward on a train. 201 00:16:18,758 --> 00:16:22,341 -Oh. Well, why didn't you sit over here? -I can't ride backwards. 202 00:16:26,558 --> 00:16:30,472 -I won't need that. We just want two teas. -Yes, ma'am. 203 00:16:31,813 --> 00:16:36,392 -I'll have a chicken sandwich. -One chicken sandwich. 204 00:16:36,484 --> 00:16:40,352 -And, uh, a glass of milk, please. -Glass of milk. 205 00:16:40,447 --> 00:16:42,439 And it's one tea, right? 206 00:16:42,532 --> 00:16:46,695 No, two teas. One for me, and one for Albert. 207 00:16:46,786 --> 00:16:48,862 Albert? 208 00:16:48,955 --> 00:16:51,446 He never drinks anything but tea on the train. 209 00:16:51,541 --> 00:16:54,542 Oh. Lemon or cream? 210 00:16:54,627 --> 00:16:58,376 -Just plain. -Just plain. Yes'm. 211 00:16:58,464 --> 00:17:00,955 -I beg your pardon. -Oh. Do you mind? 212 00:17:01,050 --> 00:17:03,837 Oh, I don't mind. It was this lady's table. Maybe you should ask... 213 00:17:03,928 --> 00:17:08,008 -Emily! -Tom! I haven't seen you for an awfully long time. 214 00:17:08,099 --> 00:17:11,931 I've been away to college. Well, what are you doing on the train, Emily? 215 00:17:12,019 --> 00:17:15,969 -Me and Albert just decided to take a little trip. -Albert? 216 00:17:17,984 --> 00:17:20,023 Oh, yes, your husband. 217 00:17:20,111 --> 00:17:22,234 Well, hello, Albert. How've you been? 218 00:17:22,321 --> 00:17:24,361 We got pretty far this trip. 219 00:17:24,448 --> 00:17:28,991 Almost two stations before Mr Green got on the train to take us back. 220 00:17:29,078 --> 00:17:32,494 He always spoils our fun, doesn't he? 221 00:17:32,581 --> 00:17:37,374 Uh, Mr Green is a man who runs a home where Emily and her "husband" live. 222 00:17:37,461 --> 00:17:39,668 They like to take trips now and then. 223 00:17:39,755 --> 00:17:43,883 -Oh, well, I understand. -Well, speak of the devil. 224 00:17:43,968 --> 00:17:46,174 You've been a very naughty girl, Emily. 225 00:17:46,262 --> 00:17:48,550 -Tom. How are you, my boy? -I'm fine, Mr Green. 226 00:17:48,639 --> 00:17:53,764 She led us a merry chase this time. Emily, you've got to go back to your room... 227 00:17:53,853 --> 00:17:57,767 -where I can keep my eye on you. -I guess there's no use arguing with you. 228 00:17:57,856 --> 00:18:00,608 Come, Albert. 229 00:18:00,693 --> 00:18:04,026 It's been pleasant visiting with you. Have a nice trip, my dear. 230 00:18:04,113 --> 00:18:06,983 Well, thank you, E-Emily. 231 00:18:07,074 --> 00:18:11,237 And, uh, 'bye, Albert. 232 00:18:11,328 --> 00:18:14,080 -Goodbye, Tom. -Goodbye, Emily. 233 00:18:14,164 --> 00:18:19,040 -We'll be dropping in on you and the folks real soon. -They probably will too. 234 00:18:21,296 --> 00:18:25,875 -Your friend Emily's quite a character. -Yes, she sure is. 235 00:18:25,968 --> 00:18:30,048 But she treats Albert better than most of us treat each other while we're still here. 236 00:18:30,138 --> 00:18:31,965 Well, she did seem pretty happy. 237 00:18:32,057 --> 00:18:36,553 You know, I bet I could get an interesting article out of a woman like that. 238 00:18:36,645 --> 00:18:40,477 -Oh, are you a writer? -Yes. Magazine articles mostly. 239 00:18:40,565 --> 00:18:43,899 I've recently done quite a few on the importance of hygiene in the home. 240 00:18:43,985 --> 00:18:46,821 Well, that sounds like a nice, clean-cut type of work. 241 00:18:46,905 --> 00:18:50,321 Well, of course it isn't always as cheerful as you make it sound. 242 00:18:50,409 --> 00:18:54,276 I've probably spent more time among poor people than a social worker. 243 00:18:54,371 --> 00:18:56,328 What's wrong with being around poor people? 244 00:18:56,414 --> 00:18:58,822 Just because you come from a poor family... 245 00:18:58,917 --> 00:19:02,037 -What makes you think I come from a poor family? -I didn't mean you. 246 00:19:02,128 --> 00:19:06,173 I meant just anyone. I'm sorry you're so sensitive about it. 247 00:19:06,258 --> 00:19:08,630 I've got nothing to be sensitive about. 248 00:19:08,718 --> 00:19:12,134 Why, my parents are... are extremely wealthy. 249 00:19:12,222 --> 00:19:14,214 I was raised in the lap of luxury. 250 00:19:14,307 --> 00:19:16,845 You sound like you were quite a spoilt child. 251 00:19:16,935 --> 00:19:21,347 It was almost impossible to avoid, being an only child. 252 00:19:21,439 --> 00:19:23,681 Oh. No brothers and sisters? 253 00:19:23,775 --> 00:19:26,396 No one. Just Fraulein and me. 254 00:19:27,278 --> 00:19:30,196 -Fraulein? -My governess. 255 00:19:30,281 --> 00:19:33,282 How tiny I must have looked in that large house. 256 00:19:33,368 --> 00:19:36,653 But I've overcome it, I think. My background, I mean. 257 00:19:36,746 --> 00:19:40,447 I just want to be known as a down-to-earth sort of person. 258 00:19:40,541 --> 00:19:44,290 I don't want people to know me for what I've got but for what I am. 259 00:19:44,379 --> 00:19:46,870 Just what are you? 260 00:19:46,964 --> 00:19:49,965 Hmm? Oh, I'm an animal husbandman. 261 00:19:50,051 --> 00:19:54,428 Graduate of Washington State, you know. Uh, this blueprint that I have here... 262 00:19:54,514 --> 00:19:58,013 it's a plan for a chicken incubator that I'm going to build. 263 00:20:01,270 --> 00:20:04,224 Ooh. That looks like quite a lot of hard work... 264 00:20:04,315 --> 00:20:07,232 for someone who's always been as filthy rich as you. 265 00:20:07,318 --> 00:20:10,070 Why do you have to put it that way, "filthy rich"? 266 00:20:10,154 --> 00:20:14,650 Why don't you make up your mind what you're mad at, rich people or poor people. 267 00:20:14,742 --> 00:20:18,407 I'm not mad at anybody. I think you make too much of the whole thing. 268 00:20:18,496 --> 00:20:23,407 What's so important about the state of your pocketbook? People are people, rich or poor. 269 00:20:23,501 --> 00:20:27,415 -Well, who says they're not? -Trouble with you is you just don't like people. 270 00:20:27,505 --> 00:20:31,419 Oh! I don't like people? I love people. I think they're wonderful. 271 00:20:31,509 --> 00:20:34,260 At least I always have up to now. 272 00:20:34,345 --> 00:20:36,053 Now, look... 273 00:20:43,270 --> 00:20:46,057 Hold still, can't ye? 274 00:20:46,148 --> 00:20:48,935 -Now listen, Nancy... -I'm Susie, Ma. 275 00:20:49,026 --> 00:20:51,517 -Well, whichever one you are, stop wigglin'. 276 00:20:53,781 --> 00:20:55,904 Tom! You're back! 277 00:20:55,991 --> 00:21:00,155 Why, sure, Ma. I came right home, as soon as I read about the big doings. 278 00:21:00,245 --> 00:21:03,863 -You didn't think I'd stay away forever, did ya? -Let me look at ye. 279 00:21:03,957 --> 00:21:07,243 My, but we're proud of ye. You ain't been workin' too hard, have ye? 280 00:21:07,336 --> 00:21:09,909 -Oh, no. -Oh, bless your heart. 281 00:21:10,005 --> 00:21:12,377 -Tom! -Hello, Pa. 282 00:21:12,466 --> 00:21:15,835 -Howdy. -How's it feel to be a big celebrity? 283 00:21:15,928 --> 00:21:18,134 You're back just in time for the ceremonies. 284 00:21:18,221 --> 00:21:21,970 They're presentin' us with the new house today. Hey, kids! 285 00:21:22,059 --> 00:21:25,309 Hey, you kids leave Tom's bags alone. Now git out of here. 286 00:21:25,395 --> 00:21:28,230 Don't wander away, any of you, and wash yourselves up. 287 00:21:28,315 --> 00:21:30,354 Yes, Ma. 288 00:21:30,442 --> 00:21:32,481 I'll pour you a cup of coffee, son. 289 00:21:32,569 --> 00:21:34,526 It sure feels good to be home. 290 00:21:34,613 --> 00:21:38,657 -Wait'll you see our new home, Tom. -We seen pictures of it. 291 00:21:38,742 --> 00:21:41,197 -It's a lulu. -I'll bet it is. 292 00:21:41,286 --> 00:21:44,655 How've you two been anyway? How's your back, Pa? 293 00:21:44,748 --> 00:21:47,155 Oh, uh, 'bout the same, I guess. 294 00:21:47,250 --> 00:21:51,330 I haven't been able to do any heavy work since that lumbago set in. 295 00:21:51,421 --> 00:21:56,877 You didn't do any heavy work for six years before it set in. Now go wash yourself up, Pa. 296 00:21:56,968 --> 00:22:00,337 -We're just about ready to take off, Tom. -I'd better freshen up too. 297 00:22:00,430 --> 00:22:03,597 -You still keep the towels in the same place? -Yep. 298 00:22:11,774 --> 00:22:13,767 -I forgot. -Don't worry. 299 00:22:13,860 --> 00:22:16,565 Might as well be one place as another. 300 00:22:16,654 --> 00:22:20,438 What you waitin' for? Go on and get cleaned up. Go on! 301 00:22:35,423 --> 00:22:39,041 Are you all ready to televise? Don't forget to get the King Henry sign in. 302 00:22:52,440 --> 00:22:55,974 And now, Mr Kettle, on behalf of the King Henry Tobacco Company... 303 00:22:56,068 --> 00:22:58,939 may I present you with the key to your dream house. 304 00:23:02,700 --> 00:23:07,658 Thanks. You haven't got a key chain, have you, Mr Tomkins? 305 00:23:08,706 --> 00:23:11,576 Well, uh, here, take mine. 306 00:23:14,712 --> 00:23:19,421 Oh, yes, I almost forgot... our little extra surprise. 307 00:23:19,508 --> 00:23:23,720 A genuine oilskin tobacco pouch, filled with that good King Henry tobacco. 308 00:23:25,222 --> 00:23:27,891 Now that's mighty nice of you folks. 309 00:23:27,975 --> 00:23:31,593 For a while, I was afraid you wasn't going to come through. 310 00:23:31,687 --> 00:23:33,893 Got a pipe cleaner? 311 00:23:35,023 --> 00:23:37,182 We'll mail you one. 312 00:23:37,276 --> 00:23:39,434 A month from now, those Kettles will have this place... 313 00:23:39,528 --> 00:23:42,695 -looking like the hog wallow they came from. -You know something, Birdie? 314 00:23:42,781 --> 00:23:45,901 A month from now, those Kettles will have this place... 315 00:23:45,993 --> 00:23:48,947 -looking like the hog wallow they came from. -That's right. 316 00:23:49,037 --> 00:23:51,659 Excuse me, Mr Kettle. We're ready to telecast you. 317 00:23:51,748 --> 00:23:56,244 We find that a dab of make-up makes our subjects look much better on the screen. 318 00:23:56,336 --> 00:23:59,705 I'm Pa Kettle. That's Ma Kettle right over there. 319 00:24:06,722 --> 00:24:09,259 They're ready to telecast us now, Ma. 320 00:24:09,349 --> 00:24:11,970 Good! What does that mean? 321 00:24:12,060 --> 00:24:14,812 -Well, you're gonna be on television. -What about the kids? 322 00:24:14,896 --> 00:24:17,648 -Do you want them in it too? -No, we'll pick them up separately. 323 00:24:17,732 --> 00:24:20,936 Pa, you come over here. Tom, get on the other side of your pa. 324 00:24:21,027 --> 00:24:23,898 You children line up back there. Hurry up now. Get out. 325 00:24:25,282 --> 00:24:27,488 Well, we're all ready. 326 00:24:29,077 --> 00:24:31,485 -Tell 'em on the truck we're all set, Jimmy. -Okay, Nick. 327 00:24:31,579 --> 00:24:33,619 All set, truck. All set. 328 00:24:35,041 --> 00:24:37,283 Okay, stand by. 329 00:24:37,377 --> 00:24:40,129 Ladies and gentlemen of the television audience... 330 00:24:40,213 --> 00:24:43,664 we're happy to bring you an informal, on-the-spot interview... 331 00:24:43,758 --> 00:24:47,886 with the winners of the King Henry Tobacco Company slogan contest. 332 00:24:47,971 --> 00:24:52,348 Ma and Pa, how does it feel to be the owners of a big, beautiful model home? 333 00:24:52,433 --> 00:24:54,759 -Well, uh... -Can't rightly say. Haven't been in it yet. 334 00:24:54,852 --> 00:24:56,762 I think it'll work out all right. 335 00:24:56,854 --> 00:25:00,354 We never did have much room in the old place to spread out. 336 00:25:00,441 --> 00:25:02,564 Ma, blow my nose. 337 00:25:02,652 --> 00:25:05,985 Don't bother your ma now. She's being telecast. 338 00:25:06,072 --> 00:25:08,989 This is a family that can do with a bit of spreading out. 339 00:25:09,075 --> 00:25:12,111 Fifteen children altogether, who we'll now see. 340 00:25:12,203 --> 00:25:15,868 There's a strong family resemblance between Ma Kettle and most of the children. 341 00:25:15,957 --> 00:25:17,866 That can be seen at a glance. 342 00:25:17,959 --> 00:25:22,870 Some of them look like their father, who is obviously of rugged pioneer stock. 343 00:25:22,964 --> 00:25:26,961 This is truly a typical, robust American family. 344 00:25:27,051 --> 00:25:30,918 The parents of such a family must, indeed, be a hearty and industrious pair. 345 00:25:33,474 --> 00:25:37,139 And now, folks, the moment I'm sure you've all been waiting for: 346 00:25:37,228 --> 00:25:41,522 -Your first glimpse at the inside of the house. -Just a minute, Mr Tomkins. 347 00:25:41,607 --> 00:25:46,020 Folks, I want to thank y'all for givin' us this send-off... 348 00:25:46,112 --> 00:25:49,563 and I want you to know that you're all invited... 349 00:25:49,657 --> 00:25:52,658 to the housewarmin' next Thursday night. 350 00:25:52,743 --> 00:25:55,199 And... you, too, Birdie. 351 00:26:04,171 --> 00:26:06,744 Well, let's go in. 352 00:26:10,928 --> 00:26:12,837 Uh, just a moment. 353 00:26:12,930 --> 00:26:15,966 Isn't there some ceremony you and Mr Kettle would like to perform... 354 00:26:16,058 --> 00:26:18,727 -before you enter the house? -Ceremony? 355 00:26:18,811 --> 00:26:21,302 Oh, like when we was first married? 356 00:26:21,396 --> 00:26:24,600 Yeah, I think that'd be real nice. Come here, Pa. 357 00:26:32,699 --> 00:26:35,700 Just like a second honeymoon. 358 00:26:35,786 --> 00:26:39,735 -Mm-hmm. And I got my new tobacco pouch too. -Uh-huh. 359 00:26:41,833 --> 00:26:45,534 All the lights, as well as many other features in the house... 360 00:26:45,629 --> 00:26:47,538 are worked by electronics. 361 00:26:47,631 --> 00:26:52,293 The slightest pressure on this switch, and the lights go on... and off again. 362 00:26:52,385 --> 00:26:55,968 Simple. Eh-eh-eh. Come with me. 363 00:27:01,228 --> 00:27:03,765 Try that. 364 00:27:07,192 --> 00:27:10,608 A little better than the old-fashioned silent butler, eh, Mr Kettle? 365 00:27:10,695 --> 00:27:12,902 Sure is. 366 00:27:12,989 --> 00:27:15,148 Ahem. This series of push-buttons... 367 00:27:15,241 --> 00:27:18,278 controls the remaining electronic features in the room. 368 00:27:18,369 --> 00:27:21,703 Push-button Radio. 369 00:27:33,092 --> 00:27:36,627 Push-button Record player. 370 00:27:49,567 --> 00:27:51,690 Push-button Television. 371 00:27:51,778 --> 00:27:54,482 And as part of our television coverage... 372 00:27:54,572 --> 00:27:57,858 on the aviation industry, take a look at this wonderful plane. 373 00:27:57,950 --> 00:28:01,699 From a swift and easy take-off, it rises like a giant bird... 374 00:28:01,787 --> 00:28:04,907 and cruises to a place on a peak in modern aviation. 375 00:28:04,999 --> 00:28:07,324 Well, I've got to be running along now. 376 00:28:07,418 --> 00:28:09,411 My train leaves in half an hour. 377 00:28:09,503 --> 00:28:12,707 Uh, thanks for showin'us around, Mr Tomkins. 378 00:28:12,798 --> 00:28:14,755 I'm sure you'll be much more thrilled... 379 00:28:14,842 --> 00:28:18,756 discovering for yourselves the other wonders of this home of the future. 380 00:28:18,846 --> 00:28:22,760 And I might add, it couldn't happen to a nicer horde of people. 381 00:28:22,850 --> 00:28:25,092 Well, good luck to you. 382 00:28:25,186 --> 00:28:27,143 Thanks again. 383 00:28:28,481 --> 00:28:31,018 -Nice fella. -He's a dandy. 384 00:28:33,736 --> 00:28:36,902 -Hey, look, an electric eye door. -Oh, boy! 385 00:28:36,989 --> 00:28:39,610 -Gee. -Boy, is this gonna be fun. 386 00:28:42,828 --> 00:28:45,533 Uh, Tom bring our bags in yet, Ma? 387 00:28:45,622 --> 00:28:47,532 No, he's out lookin' at the barn. 388 00:28:47,624 --> 00:28:49,866 Better get him. Gotta start unpackin'. 389 00:28:49,960 --> 00:28:52,581 -That's right. -Ma Kettle, where are you? 390 00:28:52,671 --> 00:28:54,747 Here. Here in the parlour. 391 00:28:54,840 --> 00:28:57,841 Come out here a minute. I want you to meet someone. 392 00:29:01,930 --> 00:29:03,839 Thanks very much. 393 00:29:20,699 --> 00:29:22,775 Well, what in the world... 394 00:29:42,387 --> 00:29:44,925 -Come on in, folks. -Oh, thank you, Mrs Kettle. 395 00:29:45,015 --> 00:29:47,719 Everybody around here calls me Ma. 396 00:29:47,809 --> 00:29:50,810 -Well, what do you think of your new home, Ma? -Well... 397 00:29:50,895 --> 00:29:55,107 the way I've got it figured, if this is a dream, it's a darn good one. 398 00:29:55,191 --> 00:29:58,643 If it ain't, it might take a little gettin' used to. 399 00:29:58,737 --> 00:30:01,821 Miss Parker wants to do an article on you and the children, Ma. 400 00:30:01,906 --> 00:30:05,406 It's a series of articles on your reaction to this house. 401 00:30:05,493 --> 00:30:07,818 That is, if you and your family don't object. 402 00:30:07,912 --> 00:30:09,988 Why, I don't see anything to object to. 403 00:30:10,081 --> 00:30:14,375 If Miss Parker can stand the kids, I guess the kids can stand Miss Parker. 404 00:30:14,460 --> 00:30:18,244 Come on in the back. I want you to meet Pa and the kids. 405 00:30:23,845 --> 00:30:26,881 Careful with that bag, Henry. 406 00:30:30,643 --> 00:30:32,600 Durn flies. 407 00:30:33,563 --> 00:30:36,433 Watch that lamp, Benjamin. 408 00:30:36,524 --> 00:30:38,813 And you, Rosie. 409 00:30:38,901 --> 00:30:42,068 Mind your step takin' down them pictures. 410 00:30:42,154 --> 00:30:46,863 Natural-born supervisor. He can tell other people how to work in his sleep. 411 00:30:46,951 --> 00:30:49,905 Yes, I see. He's doing it now, isn't he? 412 00:30:49,996 --> 00:30:53,199 -Pa's the most important man in town these days. -Hmm. 413 00:30:53,291 --> 00:30:56,161 Uh, these are the children. Hey, kids. 414 00:30:58,838 --> 00:31:01,329 Hey, kids! 415 00:31:03,092 --> 00:31:07,042 This is Miss Parker. She's gonna write a story about us. 416 00:31:07,138 --> 00:31:10,222 Uh, uh, that one's, uh, Henry... 417 00:31:10,307 --> 00:31:12,217 and that's Benjamin... 418 00:31:12,309 --> 00:31:15,512 -I'm Willie. -Oh, yeah. And, uh... 419 00:31:15,604 --> 00:31:19,602 Uh, that there's, uh... Don't just stand there. Tell her your names. 420 00:31:19,692 --> 00:31:21,815 -Ted. -Sarah. -Benjamin. 421 00:31:21,902 --> 00:31:24,025 -Billy. - George. -Danny. 422 00:31:24,113 --> 00:31:26,189 -Eve. - Nancy. -Henry. 423 00:31:26,281 --> 00:31:29,864 Nancy. No... Susie. 424 00:31:29,952 --> 00:31:32,194 -Ruthie. -Sally. 425 00:31:32,287 --> 00:31:34,197 Rosie. 426 00:31:35,791 --> 00:31:38,994 Hey, Tom! This is Miss Parker. Miss Parker... 427 00:31:39,086 --> 00:31:41,043 that's our oldest boy, Tom. 428 00:31:41,130 --> 00:31:43,585 Well, hello, Tom. 429 00:31:43,674 --> 00:31:46,509 How's the, uh, only child today? 430 00:31:46,593 --> 00:31:49,630 Uh, now, uh, now look, Miss Parker... 431 00:31:49,721 --> 00:31:51,880 I think it's time you should know... 432 00:31:51,974 --> 00:31:55,923 there's something your parents have been keeping from you. 433 00:31:56,019 --> 00:31:58,226 -Please, I... -Which one is Fraulein? 434 00:31:58,313 --> 00:32:00,887 -Now listen... -You two act like you know each other. 435 00:32:00,982 --> 00:32:03,652 We do. We met on the train coming down here. 436 00:32:03,735 --> 00:32:08,646 -Miss Parker's gonna write a series of articles about us for a big magazine. -What? 437 00:32:08,740 --> 00:32:12,405 I'm sorry, Miss Parker, but I don't think we want to be written about. 438 00:32:12,494 --> 00:32:17,405 A series of articles in a national magazine will do our town a lot of good. 439 00:32:17,499 --> 00:32:19,741 I think we've had enough publicity already. 440 00:32:19,834 --> 00:32:22,123 I don't want anyone making fun of my family. 441 00:32:22,212 --> 00:32:24,121 I don't intend to make fun of anyone. 442 00:32:24,214 --> 00:32:27,797 -You may not intend to, but that's what'll happen. -That's not true. 443 00:32:27,884 --> 00:32:31,253 I'll let you read the articles before I send them out. 444 00:32:31,346 --> 00:32:33,884 -And if I don't like them? -Well, I'll... 445 00:32:33,973 --> 00:32:36,844 -I won't send them out. Is that fair enough? -Sounds fair to me. 446 00:32:36,935 --> 00:32:40,185 -How about you, Ma? -I think it's all right for her to write about us. 447 00:32:40,271 --> 00:32:44,898 It'll let folks see that good things can come about in the most unexpected ways. 448 00:32:44,984 --> 00:32:47,273 That is, if they keep hustlin'. 449 00:35:00,869 --> 00:35:04,036 -Guess I'll turn the radio on, Ma. -Sure, go ahead, Pa. 450 00:35:07,042 --> 00:35:11,086 -Funny, it always worked in the other house. -Try again, Pa. 451 00:35:15,633 --> 00:35:19,927 Ahh. That's better. 452 00:35:20,013 --> 00:35:23,133 Now I can make myself comfortable for a change. 453 00:35:23,224 --> 00:35:27,092 -Oh, I never saw anybody as careless as you, Pa Kettle. -Now, Ma. 454 00:35:27,187 --> 00:35:30,141 I've put up with your sloppy ways for 30 years... 455 00:35:30,231 --> 00:35:33,316 just so there'd be a little peace around the house. 456 00:35:33,401 --> 00:35:36,936 But now the good Lord has provided a way so we can keep things in order. 457 00:35:37,030 --> 00:35:39,271 -I'll be darned if I'm gonna weaken. -Now, Ma... 458 00:35:39,365 --> 00:35:41,322 Don't you go "Now, Ma-ing" me. 459 00:35:41,409 --> 00:35:46,486 I'm puttin' my foot down. You're gonna learn to be neat even if it kills ya. 460 00:35:46,581 --> 00:35:49,416 So if you got any hollerin' to do, do it now. 461 00:35:53,463 --> 00:35:56,000 Wouldn't do me no good with that radio on. 462 00:35:56,090 --> 00:35:58,581 Oh, that's easily fixed. Push that button. 463 00:36:01,095 --> 00:36:04,879 -Where'd that come from? -Turn it off, Pa! It'll wake up all the kids. 464 00:36:06,267 --> 00:36:08,509 Ladies and gentlemen of the television audience... 465 00:36:08,603 --> 00:36:12,351 we're happy to bring you an on-the-spot informal interview... 466 00:36:12,440 --> 00:36:16,188 with the winners of the King Henry Tobacco Company slogan contest. 467 00:36:16,277 --> 00:36:19,028 Look, Pa. Those are the pictures they took today. 468 00:36:19,113 --> 00:36:22,861 How does it feel to be the owners of a big, beautiful model home? 469 00:36:22,950 --> 00:36:26,533 Well, maybe Ma Kettle has some thoughts on the subject. 470 00:36:26,620 --> 00:36:29,491 Get out, you two! Scat! 471 00:36:29,582 --> 00:36:33,414 Fifteen children altogether, whom we'll televise for you in just a moment. 472 00:36:33,502 --> 00:36:37,251 -We're gonna see the kids, Pa. -Shh! Can't hear the machine. 473 00:36:37,339 --> 00:36:40,210 -Talkin' 'bout you now. -There's a strong family resemblance... 474 00:36:40,301 --> 00:36:42,708 between Ma Kettle and most of the children. 475 00:36:42,803 --> 00:36:44,760 You sure take a nice picture, Ma. 476 00:36:48,892 --> 00:36:54,017 Of course, some of them do look like their father, who is obviously of pioneer stock. 477 00:36:54,106 --> 00:36:56,811 You take a nice picture too, Pa. 478 00:36:56,900 --> 00:37:00,768 This is a fine example of a typical, robust American family. 479 00:37:00,863 --> 00:37:05,192 The parents of such a family must, indeed, be a hearty and industrious pair. 480 00:37:12,082 --> 00:37:17,040 -Hey, Pa, when did we count those kids last? -Don't understand this, Ma. 481 00:37:20,507 --> 00:37:23,508 Shut that thing off before our family gets any bigger! 482 00:37:30,475 --> 00:37:32,384 Where's that master switchboard? 483 00:37:32,477 --> 00:37:36,226 Not... Not there, Ma. Over here. 484 00:37:53,456 --> 00:37:56,659 There! See how easy it is, Pa? 485 00:37:56,751 --> 00:37:59,622 Pa! Pa! Where'd you go? 486 00:37:59,712 --> 00:38:02,038 How'd you get out here? 487 00:38:02,132 --> 00:38:04,373 I don't know. Something happened. 488 00:38:04,467 --> 00:38:06,294 You must have pushed the wrong button. 489 00:38:06,386 --> 00:38:09,387 -What button? -One of these right here. 490 00:38:09,472 --> 00:38:12,758 Here we go again. Ma, do me a favour. 491 00:38:12,850 --> 00:38:17,014 -What's that? -Let me off when we get to the old place. 492 00:38:25,196 --> 00:38:28,197 Say, that's quite a ride. Want to go again, Pa? 493 00:38:28,282 --> 00:38:31,236 -Maybe we can catch the brass ring the next time. -Not me. 494 00:38:31,327 --> 00:38:34,530 I'm going to bed. I've had enough excitement for one day. 495 00:38:34,622 --> 00:38:38,750 It has been quite a day. Want a glass of hot milk before you turn in? 496 00:38:38,835 --> 00:38:40,993 It'll kind of calm you down. 497 00:38:41,087 --> 00:38:44,586 Not me. Not if you have to press a button to get it. 498 00:39:41,980 --> 00:39:44,020 Ma! Oh, Ma! 499 00:40:04,461 --> 00:40:08,293 What's the matter, Pa? Aren't you going to get undressed and go to bed? 500 00:40:11,009 --> 00:40:14,923 You're gonna have to start pickin' up after yourself, Pa. 501 00:40:22,938 --> 00:40:25,429 Pa! Pa! Where are ye? 502 00:40:25,523 --> 00:40:29,355 Pa, can you breathe? Speak to me, Pa. Come out of there, Pa! 503 00:40:39,704 --> 00:40:42,325 -Put those eggs in the cooler, Tom. -I got three dozen. 504 00:40:42,415 --> 00:40:44,906 -Will that be enough for the party tonight? -Should be. 505 00:40:45,001 --> 00:40:49,627 I only invited the town over to see the house, not to eat us out of it. 506 00:40:53,051 --> 00:40:56,170 Hey, Tom, give me a hand. This is heavy. 507 00:40:56,262 --> 00:41:00,176 -A pig, huh? You gonna barbecue it? -Oh, that's old-fashioned. 508 00:41:00,266 --> 00:41:04,560 That little piggy's gonna get his by the new infra-ray cooking stove. 509 00:41:04,645 --> 00:41:06,555 Shove it in. 510 00:41:11,235 --> 00:41:15,648 -You sure you know how to work this thing? -That booklet says it's simple. 511 00:41:15,740 --> 00:41:20,567 -Come and get it! -They can't hear you, Ma. The house is soundproof. 512 00:41:20,661 --> 00:41:23,413 Last one in's a rotten egg. 513 00:41:24,582 --> 00:41:26,954 They don't need to hear. They can smell it. 514 00:41:29,754 --> 00:41:31,960 Ma, ain't ya gonna sit down? 515 00:41:38,262 --> 00:41:41,845 Thanks a lot for what's been put before us. 516 00:41:41,932 --> 00:41:43,890 Ah-ah-ah-ah. 517 00:41:46,103 --> 00:41:51,014 Guess I ought to thank You for this brand new house and all as well... 518 00:41:51,108 --> 00:41:55,355 but if You don't mind, I'll wait until we've lived in it awhile longer. 519 00:41:55,446 --> 00:41:57,438 Amen. Let's eat! 520 00:42:12,880 --> 00:42:15,168 What's ailin' you, Pa? 521 00:42:16,592 --> 00:42:18,501 This cereal... How'd you cook it? 522 00:42:18,594 --> 00:42:22,259 -In that new pressure cooker. -Ain't as good as the old way. 523 00:42:22,347 --> 00:42:24,720 This is the funniest-tastin' oatmeal I ever ate. 524 00:42:24,808 --> 00:42:28,972 I can understand that, Pa. That oatmeal you're eating happens to be grits. 525 00:42:29,062 --> 00:42:30,972 Grits? Why, I love grits. 526 00:42:36,737 --> 00:42:38,860 What's that smell? 527 00:42:38,947 --> 00:42:42,398 Probably the pig I'm roasting for the party. I'm cookin' it with infra-ray. 528 00:42:42,492 --> 00:42:47,285 That reminds me. I must look in the book to see how long to keep it in there. 529 00:42:47,372 --> 00:42:51,915 Let's see, beef, roast beef, lamb, pork... Oh, here it is. 530 00:42:52,002 --> 00:42:55,121 Sucklin' pig, two to three... Two to three minutes? 531 00:42:55,213 --> 00:42:58,048 It's been in there longer than that. I'd better look to see. 532 00:43:05,123 --> 00:43:06,653 and you never come down 533 00:43:07,225 --> 00:43:09,134 round and round 534 00:43:09,227 --> 00:43:11,101 with the old left hand 535 00:43:11,187 --> 00:43:13,145 with a right-left grand 536 00:43:13,231 --> 00:43:16,434 hind wheel broke and the axle draggin' 537 00:43:16,526 --> 00:43:20,440 the old track and you'll come straight 538 00:43:23,366 --> 00:43:26,782 lead right out to the right of the ring 539 00:43:26,870 --> 00:43:28,779 with an elbow swing 540 00:43:28,872 --> 00:43:32,075 with a pigeon wing 541 00:43:32,166 --> 00:43:37,409 back to your partners with a pigeon wing 542 00:43:37,505 --> 00:43:40,956 and around in the centre of the floor 543 00:43:41,050 --> 00:43:42,959 and around you go 544 00:43:43,052 --> 00:43:44,961 - it's a do-si-do -What was that? 545 00:43:45,054 --> 00:43:48,055 and all eight swing 546 00:43:48,141 --> 00:43:51,592 Come on, folks. Grab yourselves a plate, and I'll dish out some of this cake. 547 00:43:51,686 --> 00:43:53,643 -Where'd you put the ice cream? -Icebox. 548 00:43:53,729 --> 00:43:56,766 Well, get it. Cake ain't any good without ice cream. 549 00:43:56,858 --> 00:43:59,562 Go get it. You want a piece of this chocolate cake? 550 00:43:59,652 --> 00:44:01,977 the bread pan pickin'out dough 551 00:44:02,071 --> 00:44:05,487 and all eight swing 552 00:44:07,326 --> 00:44:10,529 in the lead and Indian style 553 00:44:10,621 --> 00:44:14,950 -Now where you goin'? -I just figured out a way of duckin' that gorilla. 554 00:44:15,042 --> 00:44:17,747 Oh, no, you don't. 555 00:44:17,837 --> 00:44:19,746 and Indian style 556 00:44:19,839 --> 00:44:23,255 behind you 557 00:44:23,342 --> 00:44:26,011 right out to the right of the ring 558 00:44:26,095 --> 00:44:31,255 the opposite gal with a pigeon wing 559 00:44:31,350 --> 00:44:36,854 grab your partner with a pigeon wing 560 00:44:36,939 --> 00:44:40,390 round and around in the centre of the floor 561 00:44:40,484 --> 00:44:44,067 when you get straight it's a do-si-do 562 00:44:44,154 --> 00:44:46,313 - -Get me the hatchet. 563 00:44:46,407 --> 00:44:48,316 564 00:44:50,994 --> 00:44:54,529 round and around in the centre of the floor 565 00:44:54,623 --> 00:44:56,948 and around we go... 566 00:44:57,042 --> 00:44:59,118 Fill that pitcher with water. 567 00:45:44,089 --> 00:45:46,876 Hi, Pa. This is the clothes dryer. 568 00:45:46,967 --> 00:45:49,884 You put the clothes in here, turn on the heat control... 569 00:45:49,969 --> 00:45:51,927 and in a few minutes, they're all dry. 570 00:45:52,013 --> 00:45:55,512 Now over here is the thermostat for heating the entire house. 571 00:46:05,485 --> 00:46:08,770 It balances the heat in the house so that it always has an even temperature... 572 00:46:08,863 --> 00:46:11,271 regardless of how cold it is outside. 573 00:46:11,366 --> 00:46:14,283 Now, of course, the temperature control works both ways. 574 00:46:14,369 --> 00:46:17,453 During the hot summer months, when the temperature rises above... 575 00:46:17,538 --> 00:46:19,496 well, let's say 72, for instance... 576 00:46:19,582 --> 00:46:21,491 then the automatic cooling system comes on... 577 00:46:21,584 --> 00:46:24,870 and so winter or summer, you always have a uniform temperature. 578 00:46:28,091 --> 00:46:30,130 Well, let's go back to the patio. 579 00:46:35,848 --> 00:46:39,051 Help! 580 00:46:39,143 --> 00:46:42,477 Get me out of this place! Help! 581 00:46:42,563 --> 00:46:44,307 Get me out of here! 582 00:46:55,618 --> 00:46:59,236 Used to be Tom's. Guess it'll fit Henry now. 583 00:47:11,800 --> 00:47:15,501 -Shall we dance? -Well, I... I can't. My heel. 584 00:47:17,598 --> 00:47:20,005 -I'll fix it for you. -Oh, thank you. 585 00:47:20,100 --> 00:47:22,223 -Come on down to the workshop. -Okay. 586 00:47:40,913 --> 00:47:43,201 Oh, this place is wonderful, Tom. 587 00:47:43,290 --> 00:47:45,532 -Well, it keeps me out of pool halls. -Ha! 588 00:47:47,669 --> 00:47:51,537 -What's this? -You remember the blueprints you saw on the train? 589 00:47:51,632 --> 00:47:53,541 -Yes. -Well, that's it. 590 00:47:53,634 --> 00:47:56,089 It's a model incubator for hatching eggs. 591 00:47:56,178 --> 00:47:59,381 -I thought the hens did that. -Ah, not the modern ones. 592 00:47:59,473 --> 00:48:03,173 85% of all chickens are hatched artificially nowadays. 593 00:48:04,478 --> 00:48:06,470 -How does it feel? -Oh, just fine. 594 00:48:06,563 --> 00:48:09,730 -How does this work? -I've just started it. 595 00:48:09,816 --> 00:48:13,185 -I'm not sure it'll work at all. -You mean this is your invention? 596 00:48:13,278 --> 00:48:17,276 No, someone else invented the incubator. I'm trying to improve it... 597 00:48:17,365 --> 00:48:20,450 cut down the cost so that any poultry man can afford it. 598 00:48:20,535 --> 00:48:23,571 That's wonderful. Where do you put the eggs? 599 00:48:23,663 --> 00:48:27,032 Uh, in, uh, in trays like this. 600 00:48:27,125 --> 00:48:31,039 -It takes three weeks for the eggs to hatch. -What happens after that? 601 00:48:31,129 --> 00:48:33,205 Then we put 'em in special brooding coops. 602 00:48:33,298 --> 00:48:37,545 If we keep them clean and well-fed, they grow up to be wonderful egg producers. 603 00:48:37,635 --> 00:48:40,043 You mean you give them a better environment... 604 00:48:40,138 --> 00:48:43,589 and they become healthier, stronger and more profitable? 605 00:48:43,683 --> 00:48:46,637 Are you talking about chickens or children? 606 00:48:46,728 --> 00:48:50,310 Well, don't you think there's a resemblance? 607 00:48:50,398 --> 00:48:52,723 Mmm, well. 608 00:48:52,817 --> 00:48:56,815 Now this regulates the heat. You work it with these. 609 00:48:56,904 --> 00:49:00,523 Don't the hens object to all these devices that take their work away? 610 00:49:00,616 --> 00:49:02,942 Uh, not the ones that believe in progress. 611 00:49:03,036 --> 00:49:07,164 I mean, uh, incubators save the lives of millions of chickens every year. 612 00:49:07,248 --> 00:49:10,119 And that's, uh, progress, isn't it? 613 00:49:10,209 --> 00:49:13,958 -Yes. -L-In addition to which, uh... 614 00:49:14,046 --> 00:49:18,258 I think we'd better go back upstairs. They'll probably be looking for us. 615 00:49:18,342 --> 00:49:21,129 -You know, I wonder. -What? 616 00:49:21,220 --> 00:49:24,304 I wonder whether you really believe in progress. 617 00:49:24,390 --> 00:49:26,347 Wh... 618 00:49:42,408 --> 00:49:45,528 Well, where you been? Where's the pitcher of water? 619 00:49:45,619 --> 00:49:48,490 Land sakes, Pa, where'd you get that suit? 620 00:49:48,581 --> 00:49:53,124 This is the one I borrowed from your father when you and I were married, Ma. 621 00:49:55,421 --> 00:49:59,086 Attention, please. I don't like to break up the party this way... 622 00:49:59,174 --> 00:50:01,962 but since nearly everyone in town is here tonight... 623 00:50:02,052 --> 00:50:06,963 this is as good a time as any to elect a chairman for our county fair next month. 624 00:50:07,057 --> 00:50:11,803 It'll probably be Birdie Hicks. She's been chairman for the last ten years. 625 00:50:11,895 --> 00:50:17,435 Before we go nominating, I think we all ought to remember what Pa Kettle did for this town. 626 00:50:17,526 --> 00:50:19,851 His winning the house put us on the map. 627 00:50:19,945 --> 00:50:23,112 Keeping this in mind, I think it only fitting and proper... 628 00:50:23,198 --> 00:50:27,990 that we pay tribute to Pa by unanimously electing him chairman of the county fair. 629 00:50:28,078 --> 00:50:30,783 -I nominate Pa Kettle. -I second it! 630 00:50:30,872 --> 00:50:34,372 -All in favour, say aye. -Aye! 631 00:50:34,459 --> 00:50:38,955 Sounds unanimous to me. Come over here, Pa, and say a few words. 632 00:50:39,047 --> 00:50:42,132 Go on, Pa. Go on. Go on. 633 00:50:48,890 --> 00:50:52,425 Don't know. Ain't much for running a fair. 634 00:50:55,146 --> 00:50:59,524 -Come on, Mother. I've stood all I can stand. -Oh, Birdie. 635 00:50:59,609 --> 00:51:02,480 -We'll form a committee. You just preside over it. -Take much work? 636 00:51:02,570 --> 00:51:05,192 -It's an honorary position, no work at all. -I accept! 637 00:51:08,576 --> 00:51:12,526 You know, you're always ruinin' what little fun I have. 638 00:51:12,622 --> 00:51:16,205 My condition never bothers me when I'm dancing. 639 00:51:16,292 --> 00:51:20,041 Just because a man writes a slogan ain't no sign he can run a fair. 640 00:51:20,130 --> 00:51:22,371 Why, Pa couldn't run water downhill. 641 00:51:22,465 --> 00:51:25,419 What's that? 642 00:51:25,510 --> 00:51:28,713 The man who sells you everything you need: 643 00:51:28,805 --> 00:51:31,094 The one and only Billy Reed! 644 00:51:31,182 --> 00:51:34,681 Ah, how charming we look tonight. 645 00:51:34,769 --> 00:51:37,390 Ma's giving a party, and Birdie won't let me stay. 646 00:51:37,480 --> 00:51:40,397 Stay, the lady says. I was just about to join the party. 647 00:51:40,483 --> 00:51:44,018 But if you're leaving and insist, I'll give you a little gift instead. 648 00:51:44,112 --> 00:51:48,405 A hand-painted calendar to advertise that buying from Billy Reed... 649 00:51:48,491 --> 00:51:50,816 -is always wise. -Oh, thank you, Billy. 650 00:51:50,910 --> 00:51:54,030 Don't mention it. Just remember that I'll see you again... 651 00:51:54,121 --> 00:51:57,740 sell you my wares and take your pay. 652 00:52:01,003 --> 00:52:03,126 Aren't they pretty, dear? 653 00:52:10,179 --> 00:52:12,136 Well, I'll be a turkey gobbler... 654 00:52:12,223 --> 00:52:16,055 if that ain't almost the same exact slogan Pa got this house with. 655 00:52:16,143 --> 00:52:20,355 -Does that mean that Pa didn't come by it honest? -It sure does, Ma. 656 00:52:20,439 --> 00:52:24,104 And if I have anything to say about it, Pa ain't gonna get to keep this house. 657 00:52:24,193 --> 00:52:27,194 Come on. We got a lot of telegraphin' to do. 658 00:52:48,258 --> 00:52:51,295 Oh, stop trompin' around. Hustle upstairs and shave. 659 00:52:51,386 --> 00:52:55,384 -Shave? What fer? -To get the hair off your face, for one thing. 660 00:52:55,474 --> 00:52:59,306 Tom's bringin' Miss Parker home for supper before he leaves for Seattle tonight. 661 00:52:59,394 --> 00:53:01,517 You wanna make a good impression on her, don't ya? 662 00:53:01,605 --> 00:53:03,681 Why? I ain't courtin' her. 663 00:53:03,774 --> 00:53:06,940 Didn't complain about my face when you married me. 664 00:53:07,027 --> 00:53:09,020 Oh, it was a lot different then. 665 00:53:09,112 --> 00:53:12,149 Never had to do all this sprucin' up in the old house. 666 00:53:12,240 --> 00:53:17,152 -We ain't livin' in the old house no more. -Durned if I don't wish we was. 667 00:53:25,378 --> 00:53:28,130 -I didn't know you was in here. -Yes, I'm in here. 668 00:53:28,215 --> 00:53:31,500 You got four others. Use one of them. 669 00:53:31,593 --> 00:53:33,502 Durn kid. 670 00:53:45,231 --> 00:53:47,557 He made me lose my place. 671 00:53:49,319 --> 00:53:51,810 More light. That's what we need. 672 00:53:51,905 --> 00:53:53,897 That's the trouble. 673 00:54:31,652 --> 00:54:34,025 -Hi. -Oh! Hello, Tom. 674 00:54:34,113 --> 00:54:36,900 -How are you this beautiful day? -Well, I'm fine. 675 00:54:36,991 --> 00:54:40,027 -The articles coming along all right? -I don't know yet. 676 00:54:40,119 --> 00:54:42,871 I'll have a draft of the first one in a few days. 677 00:54:42,955 --> 00:54:45,660 -I won't be around in a few days. -Where you going? 678 00:54:45,750 --> 00:54:49,997 Seattle. I got this letter from the Farmers' Bank there. They want me to bring the incubator... 679 00:54:50,087 --> 00:54:53,587 -see whether it's worth financing. -Oh, isn't that wonderful. 680 00:54:53,674 --> 00:54:55,797 First a new house and now, lots of money. 681 00:54:55,885 --> 00:54:58,969 Uh, don't count those incubators until they hatch. 682 00:54:59,054 --> 00:55:03,598 Tom, I have confidence in you. This heel hasn't wiggled yet. 683 00:55:03,684 --> 00:55:07,931 Your brothers and sisters seem to be reacting wonderfully to the house. 684 00:55:08,022 --> 00:55:11,106 Well, most of it's still standing, if that's what you mean. 685 00:55:11,192 --> 00:55:14,857 This environment's gonna make a lot of difference to those kids. 686 00:55:14,945 --> 00:55:17,317 It's just like the chickens who have the good sense... 687 00:55:17,406 --> 00:55:19,648 to hatch themselves in your model incubator. 688 00:55:19,742 --> 00:55:22,659 -They're bound to turn out model chickens. -You don't say. 689 00:55:22,745 --> 00:55:25,995 Would you like to see the incubator? I just finished painting it. 690 00:55:26,081 --> 00:55:28,038 Oh, I'd love to. 691 00:55:32,087 --> 00:55:36,749 M-Ma! M-M-M-Ma! 692 00:55:36,842 --> 00:55:41,800 Ma! Ma! Ma! Where are you? Ma! 693 00:55:43,765 --> 00:55:48,427 Why, Pa! What happened to ya? Your face is redder than a fire engine. 694 00:55:48,520 --> 00:55:51,687 This rich livin' must've gotten me. I'm turnin' into a lobster. 695 00:55:51,773 --> 00:55:56,316 -Oh, Pa. -I feel like I was struck by lightning. 696 00:55:56,403 --> 00:55:59,024 I'm burning up all over. 697 00:55:59,114 --> 00:56:01,320 -Hello, everybody. -Hello, Ma. 698 00:56:01,408 --> 00:56:03,317 What's the matter with Pa? 699 00:56:03,410 --> 00:56:06,079 Why, it looks like it might be scarlet fever. 700 00:56:06,163 --> 00:56:08,784 Have you called Doc Gruber? I'll get him right away. 701 00:56:08,874 --> 00:56:12,373 And, Ma, keep the kids out of the room. This'll probably mean quarantine. 702 00:56:14,588 --> 00:56:17,043 Scarlet fever? Whew! 703 00:56:20,927 --> 00:56:23,134 What are his chances, Doctor? 704 00:56:23,221 --> 00:56:26,804 -Don't try to spare me. -Pa has a bad case of sunburn. 705 00:56:26,891 --> 00:56:30,260 -A real Fourth-of-July scorcher. -I'll be right back. 706 00:56:42,282 --> 00:56:45,069 Rub his face with oil now and then and keep him cool. 707 00:56:45,159 --> 00:56:47,911 Pa left the sunlamps on in the bathroom while he was shaving. 708 00:56:47,996 --> 00:56:49,905 That's how his face got so sunburned. 709 00:56:49,998 --> 00:56:52,489 Good thing he wasn't takin' a bath. 710 00:56:52,584 --> 00:56:55,620 I'll drop around tomorrow and look in on him again. 711 00:56:57,505 --> 00:57:00,921 It kind of bothers me to tell Pa it's sunburn instead of scarlet fever. 712 00:57:01,009 --> 00:57:05,255 -Why? -It's been one thing after another in this house for Pa. 713 00:57:05,346 --> 00:57:10,091 Nothin' but trouble from these modern gadgets. If I tell him it's sunburn from that lamp... 714 00:57:10,184 --> 00:57:15,060 -he'll want to sell this place. -Don't tell him. Pretend he has scarlet fever... 715 00:57:15,148 --> 00:57:19,276 -'til he cools down. -Wait a minute, Kim. Don't you think that's a little unfair? 716 00:57:19,360 --> 00:57:21,981 This house means a great deal to Ma and the kids... 717 00:57:22,071 --> 00:57:25,903 and I don't see why she shouldn't use a little strategy to keep it. 718 00:57:25,992 --> 00:57:29,158 -It's up to you, Ma. -I'll do it. 719 00:57:42,424 --> 00:57:44,382 Anything I can get you, Pa? 720 00:57:44,468 --> 00:57:48,133 H-How 'bout a little drink of corn whiskey, Ma? 721 00:57:48,222 --> 00:57:53,050 Corn whiskey? With scarlet fever? I should say not. 722 00:57:53,143 --> 00:57:57,889 -But, Ma, all I want is a little nip. -Nothin' doin'. 723 00:57:57,982 --> 00:58:01,896 And just to be safe, I'm gonna take this jug out with me. 724 00:58:18,126 --> 00:58:21,460 -You don't like the article. -I didn't say that. 725 00:58:21,547 --> 00:58:24,251 Oh, then you like it. 726 00:58:24,341 --> 00:58:28,339 Mmm, it's intelligent, straightforward, and, in some ways, flatters us. 727 00:58:31,139 --> 00:58:35,635 Uh... Only one thing, though. Calling me "young Tom Edison. " 728 00:58:35,727 --> 00:58:37,969 Don't you think that's going a little overboard? 729 00:58:38,063 --> 00:58:41,099 I just said you have the character of a young Tom Edison... 730 00:58:41,191 --> 00:58:44,477 a man who has the courage to overcome his environment. 731 00:58:44,569 --> 00:58:46,728 But if you don't like it, I'll take it out. 732 00:58:46,822 --> 00:58:48,898 Mmm, let's not go overboard. 733 00:58:50,617 --> 00:58:53,369 Oh, don't see any of that salad nibbled yet. 734 00:58:53,453 --> 00:58:55,493 What are you two lookin' so pleased about? 735 00:58:55,580 --> 00:58:59,032 Oh, now ain't that a foolish question. 736 00:59:03,296 --> 00:59:05,336 Whoa, whoa. 737 00:59:12,806 --> 00:59:17,598 -It was awful nice of you to come down and see me off. -Oh, well, not at all. 738 00:59:23,316 --> 00:59:26,151 I think that back wheel is really square. 739 00:59:27,737 --> 00:59:29,813 It, uh, must be contagious. 740 00:59:31,950 --> 00:59:34,904 -I feel a little square myself. -Oh, why? 741 00:59:37,580 --> 00:59:41,079 Because the only thing I could think of to tell you before the train comes... 742 00:59:41,167 --> 00:59:44,251 is that you're much nicer than I ever thought you'd be. 743 00:59:44,337 --> 00:59:48,251 Oh. Well, I have a small bulletin for you, too, Tom. 744 00:59:48,341 --> 00:59:50,250 I don't think that's a bit square. 745 00:59:50,343 --> 00:59:54,839 In fact, as they say in the younger set, I think you're real gone. 746 00:59:54,931 --> 00:59:57,848 Well, I'm about to be. 747 00:59:57,934 --> 01:00:00,425 -Do you have your tickets? -Yep. 748 01:00:00,519 --> 01:00:03,057 Don't worry about your family, Tom. I'll be here to look after them. 749 01:00:03,147 --> 01:00:06,267 Thanks. And when you head back, just give her the reins. 750 01:00:06,359 --> 01:00:08,435 -She knows the way by heart. -Oh, yes. 751 01:00:08,527 --> 01:00:11,528 Well, I-I think I can manage. 752 01:00:11,614 --> 01:00:13,523 Good luck, Tom. 753 01:00:22,333 --> 01:00:25,287 -Oh! -Here. Give it to me. 754 01:00:25,377 --> 01:00:27,335 Oh, but you won't have time. 755 01:00:31,592 --> 01:00:33,549 There. 756 01:01:07,044 --> 01:01:08,953 Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk. 757 01:01:14,051 --> 01:01:18,380 Hold still or I'll get this goose grease all over your nightshirt. 758 01:01:18,472 --> 01:01:22,339 How come this scarlet fever only showed up on my face? 759 01:01:22,434 --> 01:01:26,348 'Cause we caught it just in time, I guess. 760 01:01:26,438 --> 01:01:28,727 Oh, I'll get it. 761 01:01:32,402 --> 01:01:35,189 There he is. 762 01:01:35,280 --> 01:01:38,197 Mr Kettle, I'm very sorry to inform you... 763 01:01:38,283 --> 01:01:40,856 that your entry in the King Henry Tobacco slogan contest... 764 01:01:40,952 --> 01:01:43,241 -has been disqualified. -Disqualified? 765 01:01:43,330 --> 01:01:48,205 The contest rules stipulated that all slogans entered must be original. 766 01:01:48,293 --> 01:01:53,204 -Obviously, Mr Kettle's was not original. -Let me see that calendar. 767 01:01:55,759 --> 01:01:58,047 You mean we have to give this house back? 768 01:01:58,136 --> 01:02:00,923 You didn't win it, and you're not entitled to it. 769 01:02:01,014 --> 01:02:05,841 Tell the truth, Pa. Did you copy that slogan from this calendar? 770 01:02:05,935 --> 01:02:08,011 Can't rightly say. 771 01:02:08,104 --> 01:02:12,980 Ideas just flit around my mind sometimes. Can't say where they come from. 772 01:02:13,067 --> 01:02:16,436 Hmph. Listen to him. He ain't got nerve enough to own up to it... 773 01:02:16,529 --> 01:02:19,565 and he ain't got brains enough to lie about it. 774 01:02:19,657 --> 01:02:24,568 You stop pickin' on Pa, Birdie. He don't need brains to lie. 775 01:02:24,662 --> 01:02:29,905 Now think for a minute, Pa. Do you happen to remember when that slogan came to ya? 776 01:02:33,212 --> 01:02:35,419 Month of April. 777 01:02:35,506 --> 01:02:39,456 I remember 'cause the rains came pourin' in... 778 01:02:39,552 --> 01:02:42,339 and cut the whiskey in the still. 779 01:02:42,430 --> 01:02:44,007 Before you start evicting anybody... 780 01:02:44,098 --> 01:02:48,262 contact Billy Reed and find out who really thought up this slogan. 781 01:02:48,352 --> 01:02:52,480 Nonsense. Pa ain't had an original thought since the day he was born. 782 01:02:52,565 --> 01:02:56,397 He borrowed that slogan from Billy Reed just like he borrows from everyone. 783 01:02:56,485 --> 01:03:01,361 Besides, you can't check with Billy Reed. He's off on his route somewhere. 784 01:03:01,449 --> 01:03:04,615 I'm afraid Mrs Hicks is right. We can't delay this any longer. 785 01:03:04,702 --> 01:03:06,611 You'll have to get out in 48 hours. 786 01:03:06,704 --> 01:03:10,701 Forty-eight hours? But we can't! Pa's got scarlet fever. 787 01:03:10,791 --> 01:03:15,334 Scarlet fever, my foot. What he's got is a good, old-fashioned sunburn. 788 01:03:16,797 --> 01:03:19,039 -Sunburn? -Doc Gruber says Pa got it... 789 01:03:19,133 --> 01:03:22,466 in the bathroom under that fancy new sunlamp. 790 01:03:22,553 --> 01:03:24,545 Pa! Where you goin'? 791 01:03:24,638 --> 01:03:29,015 Let 'em take this pesthouse. I ain't stayin' in it another minute. 792 01:03:30,310 --> 01:03:33,514 I'm sorry, but rules are rules, you know. 793 01:03:33,605 --> 01:03:36,559 -Uh... Good day. -Good day. 794 01:03:36,650 --> 01:03:40,399 It may be a good day for you, Birdie, but it ain't for Pa. 795 01:03:40,487 --> 01:03:43,405 All the poor man wanted was a new tobacco pouch... 796 01:03:43,490 --> 01:03:47,191 and he ended up with a house he didn't want and a case of sunburn. 797 01:03:47,286 --> 01:03:49,243 Hmph. 798 01:03:52,749 --> 01:03:55,075 I knew our luck couldn't hold out. 799 01:03:55,168 --> 01:03:57,838 Well, I guess we'll have to move. 800 01:03:57,921 --> 01:04:01,290 Ma, you're not goin' back to that old house, are you? 801 01:04:01,383 --> 01:04:04,384 -Can't let Pa go alone. -What about the kids? 802 01:04:04,469 --> 01:04:08,763 This place is good for them. They're just now beginning to take an interest in it. 803 01:04:08,849 --> 01:04:11,055 I'll admit they haven't torn much of it down. 804 01:04:11,142 --> 01:04:14,096 Think of their futures. If you let them go back to that old house... 805 01:04:14,187 --> 01:04:16,096 they'll go to seed there. 806 01:04:16,189 --> 01:04:19,523 -At least here they have a chance. -Well, I guess you're right. 807 01:04:19,609 --> 01:04:24,271 What can I do about it? Pa's dead set against stayin' here. 808 01:04:24,364 --> 01:04:27,614 Well, we have 48 hours. You wait right here, and I'll see if I... 809 01:04:27,701 --> 01:04:30,986 Are you goin' with me, Ma? 810 01:04:31,079 --> 01:04:33,404 I asked you a question. 811 01:04:33,498 --> 01:04:36,582 It's the kids we got to think of, Pa. 812 01:04:38,336 --> 01:04:40,459 Let's think of them in the old place. 813 01:04:40,547 --> 01:04:43,251 We ain't goin', the kids and me. 814 01:04:45,843 --> 01:04:48,548 -Ain't goin'? -We're stayin' here until Miss Parker... 815 01:04:48,638 --> 01:04:51,888 -finds out about that slogan. -I don't give a hoot in... 816 01:04:51,975 --> 01:04:57,182 In... Well, I've had enough of newfangled ideas. I'm goin' home. 817 01:05:00,942 --> 01:05:02,851 Forgot something. 818 01:05:14,539 --> 01:05:16,448 We've examined your incubator, Mr Kettle... 819 01:05:16,541 --> 01:05:19,458 and found it to be a very promising invention. 820 01:05:19,544 --> 01:05:23,873 You say you need about $5,000 to finance its further development? 821 01:05:23,965 --> 01:05:26,206 -That's right, Mr Fletcher. -Course you realize... 822 01:05:26,300 --> 01:05:28,257 that in a venture of this kind... 823 01:05:28,344 --> 01:05:31,927 -the soundest collateral is the character of the man behind it. -Yes, of course. 824 01:05:32,014 --> 01:05:36,676 One's background, his family. These are the things by which you can judge a man. 825 01:05:40,606 --> 01:05:45,601 Yes, indeed, Mr Kettle. You can tell a man by the stock he comes from. 826 01:05:45,694 --> 01:05:50,107 They've always said that the apple doesn't fall very far from the tree. 827 01:05:50,199 --> 01:05:53,283 -Why, Mr Kettle. Where you going? -Excuse me, Mr Fletcher. 828 01:05:53,369 --> 01:05:56,405 -I've got to get back to my tree. -But, uh, as I say... 829 01:05:56,497 --> 01:05:58,904 there are always exceptions. 830 01:06:05,005 --> 01:06:09,003 Here they come, the mayor and the sheriff. You kids know what to do. 831 01:06:19,728 --> 01:06:22,219 -I don't like the looks of this, Mayor. -No need to worry. 832 01:06:22,314 --> 01:06:25,434 You've got the law on your side. Just follow me, John. 833 01:06:28,236 --> 01:06:30,727 Ouch! 834 01:06:30,822 --> 01:06:32,780 -That's Henry. -I'll handle this. 835 01:06:36,912 --> 01:06:40,992 -Can't you read those signs? -Put your gun down, Ma. We just came to talk. 836 01:06:41,083 --> 01:06:44,036 You can talk from where you are. Just shout. 837 01:06:44,127 --> 01:06:47,128 Forty-eight hours are up, Ma, and the law says you got to clear out. 838 01:06:47,214 --> 01:06:51,710 And I say I ain't settin' foot out of this house until I hear from Kim one way or another. 839 01:06:51,801 --> 01:06:56,095 Ma, be reasonable. If you don't leave peaceably, we'll have to force you out. 840 01:07:00,936 --> 01:07:05,265 John, round up a couple of deputy sheriffs. This is gonna be a fight to the finish. 841 01:07:13,448 --> 01:07:15,654 Pa. Pa, are ya home? 842 01:07:19,579 --> 01:07:23,244 Hey, Pa! 843 01:07:27,587 --> 01:07:30,671 Howdy, Alvin. 844 01:07:30,757 --> 01:07:33,129 What was that? 845 01:07:33,217 --> 01:07:35,969 Just blastin' a well in the back. 846 01:07:36,054 --> 01:07:38,212 That blowtorch. Turn it off. 847 01:07:38,306 --> 01:07:43,347 Oh, that? Been workin' with dynamite all my life. Ain't never killed nobody... 848 01:07:43,436 --> 01:07:45,345 yet. 849 01:07:45,438 --> 01:07:48,807 -What you got there? -Telegram. It's for Ma. 850 01:07:48,900 --> 01:07:51,936 Fella'd have to be crazy to get anywhere near that fightin'. 851 01:07:54,071 --> 01:07:56,064 -What fightin'? -Ain't you heard? 852 01:07:56,157 --> 01:07:59,407 The sheriff's tryin' to evict Ma and the kids from the model house. 853 01:07:59,493 --> 01:08:02,494 They're holdin'out with shotguns. 854 01:08:02,580 --> 01:08:06,909 Ma and the kids? Again? Gotta help Ma out though. 855 01:08:07,001 --> 01:08:08,993 All ready to dig well with shovel now. 856 01:08:09,086 --> 01:08:11,245 No time for diggin', Geoduck. 857 01:08:11,339 --> 01:08:13,580 Ma's just now fightin' the sheriff... 858 01:08:13,674 --> 01:08:17,624 -and we're goin' back to give her a hand. -You want Geoduck to get some help? 859 01:08:17,720 --> 01:08:20,840 I get many braves, make it good and hot for John Law. 860 01:08:20,931 --> 01:08:23,303 I'll get the help. You get over to the house. 861 01:08:23,392 --> 01:08:27,224 Tell Ma I'm comin' with enough dynamite to scare off an army. 862 01:08:41,076 --> 01:08:44,077 -What's going on here, Sheriff? -It's about time you came, Tom. 863 01:08:44,163 --> 01:08:48,030 Your ma's resistin' a court order to give the model home back to those King Henry folks. 864 01:08:48,125 --> 01:08:51,576 This is ridiculous. I'll go and try and straighten this thing out. 865 01:08:51,670 --> 01:08:54,541 I hope so, Tom. Your ma's a mighty stubborn woman. 866 01:08:54,631 --> 01:08:57,169 Ma! Tom's comin' up the walk. 867 01:08:57,259 --> 01:09:00,628 Well, see that none of those varmints try to pussyfoot in with him. 868 01:09:00,721 --> 01:09:03,805 Tom! I'm glad you're here in time to help us. 869 01:09:03,891 --> 01:09:07,390 -Ma, what are you doin' this for? -Holdin' on to what's rightfully ours. 870 01:09:07,477 --> 01:09:09,517 This house isn't rightfully ours. 871 01:09:09,604 --> 01:09:12,060 Pa copied that slogan from Billy Reed's calendar. 872 01:09:12,149 --> 01:09:14,141 Won't say he did, won't say he didn't... 873 01:09:14,234 --> 01:09:17,152 -until I get a telegram from Miss Parker. -What's she got to do with it? 874 01:09:17,237 --> 01:09:19,395 Doesn't Pa know whether he copied the slogan? 875 01:09:19,489 --> 01:09:24,032 Pa can't remember. He don't give a hoot. He lit out of here to go to the old place... 876 01:09:24,119 --> 01:09:28,069 -the minute he found out it was a sunburn he had. -He's there by himself? 877 01:09:28,165 --> 01:09:33,040 He'll get along all right, I hope. But it's been a long time since he's been by himself. 878 01:09:33,128 --> 01:09:35,833 Oh, this is senseless, Ma, the whole thing. 879 01:09:35,922 --> 01:09:37,831 Get the kids and go back to Pa. 880 01:09:37,924 --> 01:09:41,589 Go back to that broken-down junkyard? I should say not. 881 01:09:41,678 --> 01:09:45,676 -I don't want to bring those kids up like a bunch of rag pickers. -This sounds like Kim. 882 01:09:45,765 --> 01:09:48,719 -She put you up to this, didn't she? -Don't get het up. 883 01:09:48,810 --> 01:09:51,681 For a young girl, she's got a tolerable amount of good sense. 884 01:09:51,771 --> 01:09:54,179 And a tolerable amount of theories. 885 01:09:54,274 --> 01:09:59,481 Ma, theories are all right, but not when they break up families and endanger lives. 886 01:09:59,571 --> 01:10:02,322 -You'll have to leave here, Ma. -I ain't goin'. 887 01:10:02,407 --> 01:10:05,692 Pa's got to be taught a lesson. 888 01:10:05,785 --> 01:10:08,406 Message. Pa go to well for dynamite. 889 01:10:08,496 --> 01:10:11,450 -He say you hold out 'til he bring it here. -Did ya hear that? 890 01:10:11,541 --> 01:10:15,373 I knew Pa wouldn't let us down. 891 01:10:15,461 --> 01:10:19,376 -What's that? -Come from the old place. 892 01:10:19,465 --> 01:10:22,087 Did Pa have his blowtorch lit when he went for the dynamite? 893 01:10:22,176 --> 01:10:25,047 Yeah, Pa have blowtorch lit. 894 01:10:25,138 --> 01:10:28,055 Come on. I'll get the mayor to drive us over in his car. 895 01:10:34,438 --> 01:10:36,680 Look. Hat. 896 01:10:45,908 --> 01:10:48,233 We're sorry. Terribly sorry. 897 01:10:48,327 --> 01:10:52,277 Pa's gone. And I killed him. 898 01:10:52,373 --> 01:10:54,864 Sure as I'm standin' here, I killed him. 899 01:10:54,959 --> 01:10:58,577 -It was an accident, Ma. -No, it was my fault. 900 01:10:58,671 --> 01:11:02,965 I could've gone back to him, but I had to go fightin' for that house. 901 01:11:03,050 --> 01:11:05,375 It was that fightin' that caused it. 902 01:11:16,647 --> 01:11:19,850 -Oh, Tom, what happened? -They were tryin' to evict Ma and the kids... 903 01:11:19,942 --> 01:11:22,349 and Pa was gonna stop 'em with some dynamite. 904 01:11:23,987 --> 01:11:26,110 But he never got there. 905 01:11:26,198 --> 01:11:31,358 Oh, Ma. What about the telegram? Didn't Ma show it to the sheriff? 906 01:11:31,453 --> 01:11:35,451 -What telegram? -The one I sent her telling her the house was really yours. 907 01:11:35,541 --> 01:11:40,368 It was Pa's slogan, Ma. I borrowed it from him instead of the other way around. 908 01:11:44,091 --> 01:11:49,168 -But I did send her one. Don't you believe me? -Does it matter now? 909 01:11:49,262 --> 01:11:53,011 -Well, Tom, I... -Look, you got a climax for your article. 910 01:11:53,100 --> 01:11:56,219 Why don't you just go away and leave us alone? 911 01:11:59,356 --> 01:12:03,306 Inasmuch as Pa's earthly remains consist of a derby... 912 01:12:03,401 --> 01:12:05,608 we'll dispense with a formal funeral. 913 01:12:05,695 --> 01:12:09,989 But I'd like to say here and now that Pa Kettle meant a lot to us. 914 01:12:10,075 --> 01:12:12,317 To all of us. Oh, his faults were many... 915 01:12:12,410 --> 01:12:14,901 but his virtues far exceeded them. 916 01:12:14,996 --> 01:12:17,831 He was a simple and unpretentious man... 917 01:12:17,916 --> 01:12:20,952 a man who felt more at home with what God gave him... 918 01:12:21,044 --> 01:12:24,128 than with all the modern improvements of our age. 919 01:12:24,214 --> 01:12:27,417 That was Pa. So now, will you all bow your heads... 920 01:12:27,509 --> 01:12:30,675 and join with me in a moment of silent prayer. 921 01:12:34,766 --> 01:12:37,683 Ma, I want you to know that if there's anything we can do... 922 01:12:37,769 --> 01:12:39,975 There isn't anything anybody can do, Mayor. 923 01:12:40,063 --> 01:12:42,102 If I'd'a known this was gonna happen... 924 01:12:42,190 --> 01:12:45,025 I'd'a turned in my badge a long time ago, but... 925 01:12:45,109 --> 01:12:48,194 if it hadn't'a been me, it'd been somebody else. 926 01:12:48,279 --> 01:12:50,188 You only did what you had to. 927 01:12:50,281 --> 01:12:55,027 There's no use in my tryin' to lie to ya. I never liked Pa when he was alive... 928 01:12:55,119 --> 01:12:57,871 but now that he's gone, I... 929 01:13:10,843 --> 01:13:14,544 There they are, boys. Chase 'em out of town. 930 01:13:22,355 --> 01:13:27,396 What d'ya have to go and do that for? Those folks weren't doin' any harm. 931 01:13:28,486 --> 01:13:30,395 Birdie admitted when you was alive... 932 01:13:30,488 --> 01:13:34,485 she never really did like ya, but now that you're gone... 933 01:13:34,575 --> 01:13:37,148 Pa! You're alive! 934 01:13:38,412 --> 01:13:41,413 -Sure. Shouldn't I be? -But the explosion... 935 01:13:41,499 --> 01:13:46,125 Well, the dynamite all blew up. I had to go get the Indians to help us out. 936 01:13:46,212 --> 01:13:49,746 Now you don't have to give the house back. Ain't you pleased with me, Ma? 937 01:13:49,840 --> 01:13:53,790 Yes, Pa, I'm pleased. Couldn't you have told me where you was goin'... 938 01:13:53,886 --> 01:13:57,930 -instead of scaring me out of my wits? -Now just a minute. 939 01:13:58,015 --> 01:14:00,506 That's no way to talk to the chairman of the county fair. 940 01:14:00,601 --> 01:14:02,677 After all, what I did I did for you. 941 01:14:02,770 --> 01:14:06,684 I'll teach you to go get yourself blowed up and then come back! 942 01:14:06,774 --> 01:14:09,858 No, Ma! Ma! 943 01:14:21,747 --> 01:14:25,696 "... straighten things out. Love, Kim. " 944 01:14:28,587 --> 01:14:31,292 And wilt thou love her, comfort her... 945 01:14:31,381 --> 01:14:34,501 honour and keep her in sickness and in health... 946 01:14:34,593 --> 01:14:36,502 and forsaking all others... 947 01:14:36,595 --> 01:14:41,007 -keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live? -I will. 948 01:14:41,099 --> 01:14:44,136 -Kim, wilt thou have this man... -Got a telegram for ya, Pa. 949 01:14:44,227 --> 01:14:46,469 -to thy wedded husband... -Whatcha waitin' for? Open it. 950 01:14:46,563 --> 01:14:50,228 ...together after God's ordinance in the holy state of matrimony? 951 01:14:50,317 --> 01:14:51,796 Wilt thou love him, comfort him... 952 01:14:52,444 --> 01:14:54,982 honour and keep him in sickness and in health... 953 01:14:55,071 --> 01:14:58,690 -and forsaking all others, keep thee only unto him... -A trip to New York? 954 01:14:58,783 --> 01:15:02,033 -so long as ye both shall live? -I suppose you just wrote in for a bottle opener. 955 01:15:02,120 --> 01:15:04,362 No, Ma, bottle stopper. 956 01:15:06,500 --> 01:15:11,500 Resyncing: Walter Santos